Lost Days


Loss of Childhood

Since I last posted, things took a turn for the worst. My father, too, passed. Now, my mother and father are both gone. I know this world is a little less great because of that.

I have to take full responsibility of myself. I always had my mother and father looking out for me, anyway they could. I also know the duty of keeping my sister, brother and I together also now falls on us. To stay the close family we were, we must act to keep it so.

My parents were parents before anything else. They were also my friends and confidants, but before that all that parents.

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Consoling Fears

When you were a kid, did you ever sleep in your parents’ bed because you were scared? Ever look at them and think they were more than human?

I remember my father’s shoulders being so wide, and my mom as the epidemy of a lady. Maybe it wasn’t your parents, but there must have been at least one person you looked up to, and admired. As a teenager I ridiculed my parents. Questioned everything they did. Often thought what they thought and did was stupid.

BUT. If I was lost or just needed someone, they were there. Every time.

My mother is gone. And my father is about to undergo open heart surgery. I’m scared for him. I wish I could curl up into a ball and be held lovingly by him. But, I also wish I could console him more, and fear I fail.

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